Spring Cleansing

Confession: I hate going to the doctors. Even the most simplest routine appointment can make me feel like a 3 year old awaiting a finger prick. It's pathetic, really. But (finally) something positive came out of a visit yesterday. I was flipping through an old Oprah magazine as I anxiously awaited the nurse to call my name when something sparked my interest: A '28-day Plan to Renew Your Mind Body & Soul' by the one & only, Dr. Oz. (I'll bashfully admit, I kinda worship the guy) where was I.. hmm, I suppose I could use a little spring cleansing. So, I started scanning the pages and found Day 4: Forgive Someone. Sure, we've all heard the stats on how this practice can make you happier and healthier, but just for good measure let's hear what the Doc has to say about it; "Studies show that forgiveness can lower blood pressure and heart rate and reduce depression, anxiety, and anger." Yes - more of the same, dare I say, blah blah blah's that I already know I should do but somehow always opt not to.. until it happened.. I read the following sentence and my Ah-Ha moment occurred; "I think Oprah articulated the secret to releasing grudges when she said, 'Forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.'" Ah-Ha! Of course! How simple! Then, like all inspirational quotes, it was over.. now it is up to me to take action; to make an effort to really forgive someone. The only question then, is - who will I choose? We've all had people in our past who have hurt us, and though I don't have a friendship with the person I've chosen, nor do I plan on having one, I wanted to forgive them for me.. for me to be happier (and sure, I suppose to lower my blood pressure). Here's the thing - what happened was horrible, sad and very hurtful.. but it did happen and now it's over. However, because I'm especially stubborn and like to torture myself, I've carried all these negative feelings with me long after, while my culprit is walking around, living their life, unscathed. But Me? By not letting go of hope that the past can be changed, I relive what happened every time I think about it. So, who is being punished here for what happened? Me..? Why not forgive them for my sake? For my sanity? As I talk this through I realize what an extraordinary effort this will take me.. but if it was that simple to renew your mind, body & soul, well I guess there wouldn't need to be an article about it and I wouldn't need to post about it to inspire someone else. It would just happen and our lives would be better having done it. We do not have control over what happens to us, only how we react to it. Life is not simple, but I like to think that broken hearts and scraped knees build character. And emerging peaceful from each experience adds richness and thoughtfulness into our lives. If you take nothing else from this post, let it be this:

life is too short to be anything but

I choose happiness.